Ask PP: How do I know I’m really connecting to spirits?

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The Question: Recently I have been experiencing a lot more activity around me. I tend to go through phases where I will see, hear, feel or smell nothing for a period of time and then suddenly a rush of activity will occur- usually towards the end of a/each month and/or when I am alone. A lot of the activity I experience tends to coincide with who or what I am interested in or focused on at the time, for example, famous people/celebrities that have passed. However, this “rule” doesn’t always seem to apply. Not all deceased people I love, like or am interested in have made an appearance – not unless I feel I share a certain bond or connection with an individual. Could you please offer any reassurance that you can, that this is in fact possible and happening to me? I have a family member that has been insistent in the past that I simply experience what I want to due to my “obsessive” interests and that what occurs is not real. Their views and opinions have had quite an effect on me, causing me to question myself due to my insecure and highly sensitive nature.


Mimi’s answer: 

Hi Hayley!

You have already answered your question, so I’m basically only going to reinforce it for you, so that you may have the reassurance you’re seeking.

We all connect to one another energetically and get back the energy we put out. Some call that the “Law of attraction.” Whatever you want to call it: it’s real.

It’s precisely through our power of focus, in other words the intention behind the focus, that we create energetic connections. When we add to that emotions and feelings, the energetic bond we create will absolutely become stronger. That’s more than normal: if we relate to someone, we are naturally going to connect more easily.

Intuition is our internal guidance system and the only way to measure it is through our feelings. So having an emotional connection to something or someone will absolutely heighten our experience. That’s why mothers and their children have such a strong intuitive connection, just like twins and lovers can too.

Energy is energy: it doesn’t have a religion, it doesn’t have a gender, it doesn’t discriminate. It’s there for anyone to tap into by just making a choice to become more aware of our intuition and feelings.

So rather than going at this with the pressure of having to justify your experiences to your family or anyone else, my suggestion is to go back to having fun with it – allow yourself to go there. The fear of being wrong or that you will get caught up in imagined fairy tales is just your logic trying to fuck with you, and by your comments on your family’s projected fear of you suddenly losing your sense of logic, (a.k.a. intelligence), I would suggest you look into what core beliefs you have about intelligence and logic vs. feelings and emotions. Does one really exclude the other? (Hint: no!)

I don’t mean to sound like some pop-psychology self-help guru, but the first thing that helps when we want to get in touch with our intuition and feelings is to start loving ourselves a bit more, including all our quirks, and unlearning a bunch of negative beliefs about ourselves. Having what you call “obsessive” tendencies is precisely what you need to help your connection!

The ability to have a concentrated focus of attention on a spirit or energy or anything is a serious plus when it comes to this stuff. That’s why so many people meditate: to learn how to focus. It takes some people years to learn how to do that, and here you are, saying you do this naturally and easily! (If I were in your shoes, I would tell Debbie Downer to kiss my “obsessive” ass *cough*) 😉

I have ADHD – a ridiculous label that has the word “disorder” in it, which makes me laugh. All these labels do is point out differences that are supposed to make me feel abnormal. If I believed that, I would probably be popping pills, which is of course the last thing I want to do because I happen to think that it’s up to everyone else to adjust to me and my ka-ray-zee thought patterns, and not the other way around. The mere thought of taking pills to alter my energy so as to not disrupt everyone around me is one that I find completely insane.

I bring this up because people like to think that I, like so many others with ADHD, have focus issues, but I would argue that it’s quite the opposite: I’m pretty awesome when it comes to focusing. I just don’t care to focus on whatever it is everyone else thinks I should be focusing on. When I have an invested interest in something, I focus like nobody’s business.

So someone else decided you were “obsessive.” Is that really true? What does your heart and your feelings have to say about that? Your true, inner self most likely has another word for it, like “passionate.”

What I’m getting at is that we can always choose to perceive ourselves in a positive light rather than allowing others to project their judgmental crap on what makes us unique and different.

The only way to stop people from projecting any form of concern for our beliefs and experiences is to start owning up to them and our true self, and to no longer allow ourselves to be weakened by someone else’s fears. When you own all of who you are, you project confidence. Self-confidence shuts anyone up, because people no longer see you as someone who is confused or who can be taken advantage of.

People who express concern of this nature are really usually just acting out of love. They don’t realize their fears are making them impose conditions on you, because we all do that to one another on a regular basis. You can have compassion for that, thank your family for their concern, and end the conversation right there.

I’m not going to tell you your experiences are real, because you already know they are. Your intuition is strong, and you are aware of your feelings enough to notice that energy tends to manifest more often when you focus on someone you relate to, when energy has more momentum during specific times of the month (moon cycles are certainly not witch tales!) or when you are alone, meaning when your capacity for concentrated focus is greater. I understand you just wanted us to validate that, but you came to this conclusion yourself, through your intuition.

Doubt is ok, everyone doubts. I doubt, Will doubts, we all doubt. But as a very wise spirit told me very recently: To have faith is to know no fear. 

William’s answer:

Hello Hayley.

I’ll spare you a very long winded answer. Mimi did a pretty good job summing up what I was going to touch upon, almost word for word.  So instead I’ll just give you one of my new favorite lines from a series of movies that are great at spreading the magic around.  This was one that came to me while reading your question. I hope it sums up my point of view in far fewer words than I could do on my own.

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows